This is Carlos Alberto Parreira,
the famous Brazilian (football) coach,

headhunted (or foothunted?) to coach the South Africa side in the run-up to the 2010 World Cup, to be held of course in South Africa. Not to be confused by the way with that other iconic Brazilian coach, Luiz Filip Scoleri – they look vaguely similar, except one with a moustache and one without.

Anyway, Mr. Parreira signed the contract, and arrived in South Africa at the end of last month. There were awed articles showing him emerging from his Sandton multi-star hotel to go house hunting for some suitable des res which start thereabouts at R20 000 per month. Mr Parreira would be able to afford this, since his contract stipulated a fee of US$ 250 000 per month, or R 1 800 000: about US$ 8000 per day (you can play around with a calculator for a few other parameters).

All started off well: he attended a couple of matches, and set up a training camp. Then a tiny problem – the South Africa Football Association had neglected to apply for a work permit for him (they probably reasoned they are God, with the destiny of the universe in their hands, so why should they consider such minutiae?). But the SA immigration authorities took a different view – Mr Parreira, on pain of arrest is not allowed to attend any games, takes notes off a televised game, or do anything which could be construed as ‘work’. So he is sitting around, at a cost of US$8000 per day. If South Africa, is anything like Namibia, where a work permit even for a celebrity can take 6 months to a year, we may be talked about a lot of dosh down the tubes.

This seems all to symptomatic of the hallucination and obsession, which is gripping the South Africa football authorities and the Government around 2010. Billions are being spent, for instance, on vast stadia holding five times what normal (post-cup?) crowds will be able to sustain. When any soul has the temerity to timidly suggest that one could manage by spending say a billion or two Rand less, he/she is accused of having an apartheid mentality. Government assume that the World Cup will be an event of cosmological significance, changing the destiny of a country and a continent, but it won’t be. It will be great, it will be amazing, but it will be a 4-week football tournament. And that’s it. Six months after Deutschland 2006, can anyone remember anything about it apart from the head butt? The only part of South African society which will, one can predict, make a huge killing (unfortunately probably literally) is the criminal industry.

That’s the long term. In the short term, I hope that work permit comes through soon.